In a country that is enjoying some form of democracy after a cruel and turbulent period of demeaning racial separation, it is heart warming to see inter racial couples become more common as perceived ideas about vanity and race fall to aside and give way to love that is strong enough to forget the past, unafraid of what criticism their choice may entail.
Older members of society are less acceptant of this movement. The ideas and values that have been tattooed onto their hearts hinder their tolerance, understanding and enjoyment of life. This is not to say that the South African youth are completely impartial. Social groups are still fairly limited to the same race and some young people have very strong ‘pre-democracy’ views. Over all South African youth have a united spirit and understanding of each other, they know and accept that certain groups simply get along better with people of the same race who have the same way of life, interests and preferences.
A common and polite reason for people not agreeing with inter racial relationships is the culture issue. There is little substance to this concern as any serious relationship is based on the compatibility of two characters. In all relationships, each party is challenged to give things of themselves that they would prefer to keep. Whilst the contrast of culture is a valid concern that should be addressed, accepting the fact that your partner has a certain way of life and allowing them to be who they are within their rights is critical to the success of any relationship. Living with different people and doing different things stretches your awareness. Like that you can understand where certain traditions, customs and beliefs come from. This is not to say conformation is required – knowing what they are about puts you in a better position to deal with people’s behavior and have reason when differences arise. No human is perfect - we all have lessons to learn and weaknesses to strengthen. Our diversity allows us draw and absorb abilities, skills and knowledge from one another.
Objections from family are the biggest source of cultural spats and difficulty. Is the conflict and separation worth being with the one you love? Society will never be homogenous. We are allowed to be against the idea and our views should be respected – everyone for their own. It requires a high level of emotional intelligence to do this, to live and love with our differences. Quite frankly, family members who have no valid grudge (i.e. poor character, bad habits, abusiveness) against a partner of another race show little love, care or respect for the member involved by causing trouble. It is unfair to be prejudice or treat people with disrespect if you do not agree with what they do, even in the family.
Another aspect to consider is how a person is viewed as a traitor for choosing another race above their own. Black men may find it offensive to see a black woman with a white man, feeling that he is being discriminated against. He may also feel protective over her, based on feelings from the past. Other black woman may feel she is making them look undignified and easy to come by. Similarly a black man dating a white woman may be offending black woman. These emotions are natural but are they always justified?
The concept is not as extreme as people think it to be. Whether you agree with inter racial relationships or not, admire the beauty and splendor of two completely different lines of genes who have embraced each other with love and acceptance. Doing so gives our society a supreme edge of development and signature.
